Why Practicing Gratitude is Different Than Being Thankful
You see a lot about "practicing gratitude" these days. Especially this time of year when you can find all kinds of inspirational knick-knacks out there with the word Gratitude or Thankful in a trendy hand-lettered script. With COVID numbers skyrocketing and the holiday season on lockdown, it feels near impossible to be thankful for much of anything. 2020 has thrown a lot at us in a very short time. And all this has gotten me thinking about a few things.
There's a difference between being thankful and practicing gratitude.
I'm thankful for my house and my car and food and family and clothes and my dog and electricity and my iPhone and the list could go on and on and on. Thankfulness is when you receive something and you are happy to get it. Gratitude is a similar feeling, and I am grateful I have all of those things. But practicing gratitude is a slightly different exercise. When you find yourself faced with feelings of frustration and disappointment, when you find yourself complaining, that is the perfect time to practice gratitude. It's the ability to allow what is.
Here's how. Take a deep breath, ground your body into the earth, and recognize the feelings you're having without judgement. Then, thinking about whatever it is that is causing the negative emotions, ask what there is about it you can be grateful for. Your intuition (God/spirit/whatever word you use) will usually help you recognize something good. Even if all it is an opportunity to learn and grow that you can't see or don't understand yet (i.e. becoming a better person).
You can choose to be grateful, to find the good, in all things.
When the pandemic hit in the spring, we had to give up a lot, and it was hard to be grateful for what seemed like a dystopian nightmare. It might be really tough, especially if you’ve lost anyone to COVID, but think about something that has changed that you can be grateful for. Maybe if you’re working totally from home now, you can be grateful for the lack of commute to work. If you’re home all the time and your kids are driving you crazy, be grateful everyone is safe and together (because trust me, as a soon-to-be empty nester, you only have your kids around for a very short time). Maybe you get to see your spouse more often because you’re both home. Maybe since everyone’s home, nobody’s gotten colds at all so far this year! Or think on a global scale, like how the lack of tourism is having a positive impact on the ecological system. Find the good within the bad situation, and feel the gratitude within your heart to help ease the sadness.
When you can come to understand a situation, even if it sucks, it becomes easier to deal with.
Something my hubby said the other night when we were having a conversation about having to miss out on things. Big milestones, moments we'll miss we can't ever get back because of quarantine restrictions. Yeah, it sucks. But when you stop to process why something is the way it is, understanding the situation helps us accept it. If I can recognize that limiting my exposure can potentially save lives, and by doing my part, I am helping reduce the spread, I can let go of some of that disappointment and frustration. I get that cancelled trips are a real bummer, trust me. But I believe that if I think of the world beyond myself and my desires, I am giving up something for the greater good.
It's all a matter of perspective.
I can choose to look at it as a loss, missed opportunity, that 2020 sucks ass. Everyone has their own perspective on everything. And most people don't agree. You may hate the rain and dark and cold and complain about the sun going down at 4 o'clock. I may find comfort, warmth, and beauty in the rain and see the increased darkness as more time to rest. Most things we can choose to see from a different perspective. And when you are open to new perspectives, it allows for greater understanding and usually, happiness.
P.S. I am so grateful to have you reading and following along in the this journey of a Life, Inspired.
